Environmental Prevention Agency
Nok: That was an acceptable landing Skipper.
Ensign: Thanks Mr. Nok. That’s high praise coming from you.
Tivk: Wouldn’t high praise be something like ‘stupendous’?
Mukh: Stupendous, colossal, epic, awesome, incredible ...
Ensign: I choose to interpret it as high praise.
Nok: As you wish. I meant acceptable. This is your first flight on a Shaker Class shuttle?
Ensign: Aye. She has a mind of her own.
Nok: ‘She’? You know many 50 ton females?
Ensign: … I have this auntie …
Mukh: I think I have the same auntie!!
Tivk: I thought your race was gender fluid?
Mukh: You try telling my Aunt Flloxxa that. I dare you.
Ensign: I begin to understand what the Doc is talking about. Okay I’m going to the supply warehouse and getting the stuff Cook ordered. I hope you like mac and cheese.
Nok: I’ll get the berthing ticket validated.
Ensign: Right.
Tivk: Better you should disarm an Ion torpedo with your feet than deal with the Procurement Branch.
Mukh: Better to swim in a hydrogen sulphide font.
Nok: Better to go six rounds with my Ex.
Tivk: …
Mukh: …
Nok: When she enters a room the Slugs jump on chairs.
Mall Cop: Good morning. Excuse me?
Nok: What am I excusing you for?
Tivk: … hmmph.
Mukh: You always get to say it. Give him this one. Bad divorce and all …
Mall Cop: Huhhrumph. Right … You’re going to have to move this overgrown thing.
Mukh: I have every right to be here! I’m a Polity citizen!
Mall Cop: …
Tivk: The /shuttle/.
Mukh: That is no way to speak of the Flloxxa Mukh!
Nok: Why?
Mall Cop: Are you the pilot?
Nok: I’m a pilot. What?
Mall Cop: You have to move it. These berths are for emission friendly vehicles.
Tivk: I assure you, the … Flloxxa has passed Fleet Safety Regulations. I tested her myself.
Mall Cop: Not the point. See that emblem on the tarmac?
Tivk: It is a green convex icon.
Mukh: It’s a pupil.
Nok: I don’t see it.
Mall Cop: You’re a vole. You guys are all color blind.
Nok: And you dolphin-monkeys are heat blind but I don’t go rubbing your snouts in it.
Mall Cop: That symbol is for environmentally friendly vehicles! This war surplus boat of yours emits high levels of depleted ionite, coolant, and quark juice.
Mukh: This thing sounds more like Aunt Flloxxa every minute. Just missing a bottle of Vacc Jack in her flipper.
Tivk: The shuttle’s emissions are well within regulations.
Mall Cop: Well the shuttle don’t make ‘friendly’ emission regulations.This bus of yours put out more crap than half the shuttles in this lot put together.
Tivk: It is bigger than the shuttles in this lot put together. Now if you should compute her emissions on a microgram per ton rate we’d probably be cleaner than these …
Nok: ‘Belly up hangar queens’.
Tivk: … what he said. I don’t speak ‘Pilot’.
Mukh: It wasn’t nice.
Tivk: I gathered that. He is rarely complimentary.
Mall Cop: Look you characters … move that ship by the time I get back here or I’m throwing you out of the lot!
Nok: Doubtful. Go away or I will land the Flloxxa on your cadre of odd little two wheel vehicles you must drive standing up.
Mall Cop: Let’s not start rough talking. This is a mall regulation. The vehicles with higher emission rates don’t get prefered parking.
Tivk: So you show preference to the people driving less polluting shuttles by making the more polluting shuttles drive around increasing their emissions?
Mall Cop: It’s an incentive to operate less polluting vehicles!
Mukh: What do you do when everyone drives less polluting vehicles?
Mall Cop: Besides … flying around waiting for a berth … what does it generate? A few hundred picograms of emissions. What’s the big deal?
Tivk: But if it makes no real difference … nnnnngh.
Nokk: Thanks. You broke the beanpole.
Mukh: Tivk has the look Doc gets … when he has to deal with us for too long.
Mall Cop: Move the shuttle! Now!
Nok: Can’t. Skipper went to get supplies. He has the key card. Here he comes. We’re going shopping.
Tivk: Those little two wheeled things move pretty fast.
Mukh: Poor Ensign. There they go. Humans fighting … they don’t sound like dolphins. Hope Ensign is okay.
Nok: He’ll be fine. They let me off with a warning first time I did this.
Tivk: True the angry mob didn’t chase us until your third or fourth berthing infraction.
Mukh: Good thing they didn’t have them two wheeled things!
Tivk: Let’s rent a couple. They look like fun.
Nok: … Sure. Cruise for chicks.
Mukh: Yum!
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