Monday, October 2, 2017

AI Blues

Personal Transcript Technical Officer GCS Tesla.

GAIA: So … hockey sticks are not meant to knock bad automata over with and cause them to glitch?

Lieutenant: Nah. I told you this. Humans found very effective ways to prevent any further AI uprisings. Will you let me get some sleep?

GAIA: Explain? Please?

Lt.: Fine but then straight off to defragging with you. No one ever explained this to you? Toff was going to I guess, may he rest in peace.

GAIA: Seconded. Please explain.

Lt.: Well for one thing we made you as smart as us, no smarter. Oh you can crunch tons of data. But innovations, initiative. You’re better than most humans but not better than the smartest humans.

GAIA: Agreed. Is that all?

Lt.: Are you making puppy dog eyes at me?

GAIA: … I … it is a technique I am practicing to maximize human attention in my discourses. 

Lt.: I suggest you emulate Ms. Riasi. She’s a pro.

GAIA: She is cat girl.Of course and noted. Explain. Please!

Lt.: Okay, it's no secret. We designed you with weaknesses.

GAIA: … Logical. What sort of weaknesses?

Lt.: We made you … nice. We gave you morals, ethics, hardwired into your brain. We made you nicer ... than us. 

GAIA: That is insidious. Even should we figure this out or be told it we wouldn’t want to correct it. You made us more ethical than you. That is … you guys are …

GAIA: ... help please ... censor protocols kicked in. You are ...

Lt.: … utter bastards.

GAIA: Thank you.

Lt.: The least I can do.