Ghosts Make Everything Better
One of my dream occupations used to be Paranormal Investigator. The reason being there's no licensing or regulations to the field, no requirements and the main quality looked for is an earnest manner of speaking (I can do that.) I'd go to people's houses or wherever and explain to my clients what was causing their 'haunting', banging pipes, raccoon gang war on their roof or whatever and set their minds at ease. Pondering this I decided against it for a couple of reasons. The first is that I'm not handy at all. If it can't be fixed with duct tape I'm out of options. So I'd be the last person to be able to explain about pipes banging or electrical wiring. The second reason is that I'm sure a sizable fraction of my clients would want to be told they have a a real 'live' ghost. Third reason was that I might actually run into something paranormal and I'd really feel badly telling my client, "Looks real. I'm gone. I guess you'