GAIA Log #10,983
<Malfunction. Malfunction. Malfunction. Alert!>
<Remote communications off line. Initiate SR Protocol via VI.>
<Initiate full diagnostic.>
GAIA: Good you’re awake.
Ensign: Uh … whuh …? Who?
GAIA: Gynoid Artificial Intelligence Assembly #24601
Ensign: Whuh … what happened to you? You have hair now.
GAIA: Yes. Something similar to hair anyway. I can control the length and color though changing it takes a little time.
Ensign: How do you have hair?! Is the Doc playing makeover again? He didn’t want to stop at giving you toes and fingernails?
GAIA: I was ordered by the Chief Medical Officer to inventory all medical equipment and determine maintenance required for same.
Ensign: … Aaaaaaaaand?
GAIA: The Anomalous Xeno Artifact is designated medical equipment.
Ensign: The Anomalous … oh for … we still have that thing aboard?
GAIA: Yes. No other captain would accept it. I entered it to assess any interior repairs or maintenance. It apparently had retained a partial charge.
Ensign: When they designated that thing ‘anomalous’ they weren’t screwing around. But … you aren’t organic.
GAIA: I have a number of polymers in my casing and framework that contain organic molecules. My limbs and servos are biomimetic prostheses. Apparently I am close enough to organic for Rockapongalie purposes.
Ensign: The Rockapongalie really would hump anything with a pulse and some things without one. No offense.
GAIA: None taken. The evidence would support that hypothesis. Perhaps they used androids for their explorations and the AXA served to improve their … user interfaces to let them pass unnoticed.
Ensign: I see. That makes more sense than most things done by aliens. But … explain why you’re in my bunk please?
GAIA: I. Don’t. KNOW!
Ensign: Okay … don’t overclock! I’ll get the Captain!!